"Mummy, will there be shopping centers in heaven?"

"No love, of course not. Although, heaven being the first rate gated community that heaven is, there will be a wide selection of high end boutiques and parlors." 

∞

pay close attention, this message will only be broadcasted once:

saps of the world, unite. your number is up, and believe me, you will be left at the departure gates, while the chosen ones head off to new worlds of menial splendor. do not, i repeat, do not let this be your chosen moment to rise up, in some moment of gravely mis-forged valor, and do nothing. there is no creed for you to answer to in this way, do not take action yet. have faith.

there is a higher calling you have yet to answer to, and we will be needing every single of you,

every last nitwit of the world, to rise up together and do something, to act and give yourself up for a cause. the time is nigh, just be ready, it is all we ask.

end of broadcast.

a glimmer of hope, but for whom? what colorless and anemic entity could possibly hearken to this unwarranted calling? what gutless gathering of sad sycophants could find hope, and better yet; purpose, in such a decree? what vile and corruptible being or beings would want to unify with such a prosaic personnage of pinheads? to what end? what purpose can it serve to congregate such a jumbled body of blubberheads to beligerently battle the inevitable coming of their butterscotched destinies?

it's normally so tidy in here.

in my mind i spell the word "panasonic" three times over. the tape recorder sits on the table, devoid of audible activity. before i can either force it or stop it, like it was always there to be uttered, i think, i formulate the question:

why did it begin?